Girl : Papa Ek Ladka bar bar I LovE U bolta hai
Kya karun?
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Father : Beta us se shadi kr le Zindagi mein agar dubara bol de to mera Naam badal dena…

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Doctor to Aishwarya’s baby:
you know who is ur Grand father?
Baby: yes, Big B
Who’s ur Mother: Miss world Aishwarya.
Then who is ur father?
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Baby: No IDEA sirji. -:)

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Pappu : yaar jab main maru to mere maatam pe samne wale padosiyon ko zarur bulana
Peter: kyun?
Pappu : yaar us ghar ki auratein laash se lipat-lipat kr roti hai !!!

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I love U Ka Matlab
LALU: “I love u” iska matlab ka hota hai?
SONIA: Mai tumse pyar karti hu.
LALU: Lo kar lo baat…
Angreji me ek sawal kya puch liya,
Pagli fida ho gayi humpe.

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Ek bar ek Sarabi Apni Eye donate karne gaya
Doctor ne Sarabi se pucha : Kuch kahana chahte ho
Sarabi : yes, Jisko bhi meri ye Eye lagaoo pls usko bata dena ki ye 2 pag lagane ke baad hi khulti hain….

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Ek chote bacche ne apani pregnant
mummy se pucha : Isme kya hai?
Mummy : Issme pyara sa Baby hai.
Baccha : Itna pyara tha to khaya
kyu ussko?

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Sardar ka Dar!!

Sardar darvaze pe GUN liye khara tha
Wife: y r u standing here?
Sardar: Sher k shikar pe ja raha hon
Wife: To jao na..!
Sardar: Kase jaon baher KUTTA khara hai

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A sardar had a child after 3 month of marriage.
He asked his wife ye 3 month k bad bacha kaise howa?

Wife replied: tumhari shadi ko kitna arsa hua?
Sardar: 3 months.

Wife: or meri shadi ko ?
Sardar: 3 months

Wife: or bacha kitne month k baad?
Sardar: 3 month.

Wife: total kitne hue?
Sardar: oye 9 months & start dancing
Balle Balle ;->

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Sardar sent SMS to his BOSS:
“Me sick, no work”
Boss SMS back:
“When I am sick I kiss my wife try it”
2 hours later sardar sms 2 boss:
“Me ok, ur wife very sweet”

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Santa : Why do girls close
their eyes while kissing a guy?
Guess‚
Guess
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–
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Banta : Yeh ladkiyan ladkon
ko kabhi khush nahi dekh sakti.

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Teacher: Tumhare Abbu Kya Kaam Karte Hain?

Bacha: UPS ke Maalik hain.
Teacher: Nice.
Acha ye UPS ka kya matlab hai?

Bacha: “Usman Pakora Shop”

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Hey U Know
Which is the best day to propose a girl.. April 1
U Know Why??
If she accept its your luck
otherwise just tell April Foooooll.

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Girlfriend: Its 2 tight
Boyfriend: Dont worry,I will put it slowly,

Girlfriend: Push it in,
Boyfriend: Ah..I cant,
Girlfriend: Its painful,
Boyfriend: Forget it.
–
–
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Well buy new WEDDING RING!

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Ek Chiti ne Hathi se kaha – Kya tum apna underwear mujhe 4 din ke liye udhar main de sakte ho?
Hathi (laughing) – Kya tum mere underwear ko pehnogi!!
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Chiti – Nahi re… beti ki Sadi ke liye pandal lagana hai!

Santa : Kal mane Sapna dekha ki Tum mujhe Jewelry aur cloths gift kar rahe ho,

Banta : Aur mane dekha ki tumhare Pita uska bil de rahe hain…

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Banta : Oe sante, kya hua, kal teri Sadi hai… phir bhi tu Udas hai,

Santa : Ladki walo ne kaha hai ki Barati kam Lana, Pata nahi Papa mujhe le jayenge ya nahi…

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Teacher : Nuton ka rule sunaoo,

Student : Pura to nahi aata, Last line aati hai,

Teacher : Sabass! wahi sunaoo…

Student : Ise hi kahate hain Nuton ka Rule….

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Americi : Hamare Desh ke Kutte Futboll Khelte hain,

Japani : Hamare Desh ki Machliya Dance karti hain,

Chini : Hamare Desh ke hathi Cycle chalate hain,

Indian : Bas… Hamare Desh ke Gadhe to Sarkar chalate hain…

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Santa : Tu next Janam main kya banna chahta hai,

Banta : Main agale Janam main Chuha banna chahta hu,

Santa : kyu!

Banta : kyuki meri Biwi is duniya main only Cuhon se hi darti hai…